Proverbs 17:6-9 – How to keep peace

Whether young or old we all want to live peacefully with others. Proverbs 17:1-5 show us that peace can be experienced in the home as well as in the community. This is foundational for orderliness in life and living. Without a doubt, peace is needed at all stages and in all aspects.

In Proverbs 17:6, we can see that one tremendous blessing in a family where peace is found, is one where healthy intergenerational relationship is seen and experienced. Having children is certainly one of the greatest blessings in life. One of the mandates God gave to man was the command to be fruitful and multiply. It was given at the dawn of creation of mankind. So, when we consider this mandate, we conclude that to have a sizable family with lots of children and grandchildren shows strength and stability in a family. In a healthy family, the grandfather finds his youth renewed in his grandchildren. And the young live their lives to honour the father and grandfather by being obedient to their godly instruction and training they have provided. When children are well brought up, they are a reflection of their godly parentage. This is a powerful challenge and motivation for us fathers to be godly, and to raise our children in the fear and nurture of the Lord. This will give them a reason to be proud of us.

Verse 7 indicates that from the speech of a person we can identify what sort of a person he or she is. It seems out of character for a depraved person to speak about integrity. Why? He has no godly substance in his life to back up what he says. He may speak excessively and eloquently, it will still be incongruous with his character. In the same way, it is also inappropriate for a noble person to speak lies and falsehood.

Verse 8 gives us a statement of fact about bribing without dealing with the ethoics of the practice. For peaceful negotiation, gift has been used to buy friendship, seal a business deal, and even to mollify or pacify an anger. The subtle implication is that the opinion of a person who offers bribe cannot be taken seriously. When a person uses a gift or a bribe to gain favour, he thinks nothing about it.  Bear in mind that the purpose of a bribe is to get someone to act in a way contrary to justice or the real situation. This is not in keeping with integrity. The Bible clearly states in Exodus 23:8, “You shall not take a bribe, for a bribe blinds the clear-sighted and subverts the cause of the just.” It is not in keeping with the desire to promote peace.  

Verse 9 shows us how to have interpersonal peace. When a friendship is treasured, a person would be willing to overlook an offense. One of the common things in life is that people will take offense at the slightest remark. People who are highly sensitive tend to read more than what is intended. When this happens, a molehill becomes a mountain. And a small matter gets escalated into a huge one. This is what often separates good friends. The best way not to nurture hurt is to forgive and forget. It is good not to repeat and narrate the hurt over and over again. For when one keeps repeating a hurt, the grudge is constantly brought back to the mind. The grievance will be kept current and it will in turn alienate and separate the best of friends.

It is true that if we do not lose our peace we will keep our joy. And the best way to experience peace according to Paul in Philippians 4:6-7 is, “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”