2 Samuel 3:1-5 – On marital faithfulness

Abner by his action had caused a prolonged war between the house of Judah and the house of Israel. It did not end with Asahel’s death but went on until David became king over all of Israel. We will see that the nations would again be divided after Solomon’s reign. But for now, David was reigning over Judah from Hebron. Ish-bosheth, on the other hand, was made the puppet king of Israel by Abner and was ruling from Mahanaim. The conditions between David and Ish-bosheth could not be more contrasting. The first five verses of 2 Samuel 3 describe David’s progress. He was gaining ground and getting stronger. His family was getting bigger and six sons were born to him by his six wives. Ahinoam gave him Amnon, and Abigail, Chileab. Maacah bore him Absalom and Haggith, Adonijah. Then Abital bore him Shephatiah and Eglah, Ithream.

Remember David also had an earlier marriage. He married Micah, the daughter of Saul. For that marriage, he paid a great price of 400 foreskins of the Philistines to secure her hand. But the unreasonable Saul later gave her to another man by the name of Paltiel, the son of Laisha. 2 Samuel 3:14-16 tell us that David demanded that Ish-bosheth return Michal to him. And he did as David demanded. Michal was taken from her second husband and returned to David. Michal was childless.  

While David was getting stronger and his reign becoming more entrenched, it also must be said that the polygamy he entertained also gave occasion for moral weakness. Having more women added to David’s life was a sign of his growing power. But like it or not, this is more a human delusion than real. While polygamy was a  common practice among people in the Old Testament, it was more an indication of men’s weakness than God’s approval. We find in the Scriptures, definite calls to marital faithfulness and fidelity. God uses unfaithfulness in marriage to illustrate His people's unfaithfulness to Him. In the book of Malachi chapter 2, we find one clear call of God to monogamous marriage and marital faithfulness. And when we cross into the New Testament, we find the call to fidelity in marriage even more defined. There is much more that could be said about the ills of polygamy and the blessedness of a monogamous marriage, but it is not the purpose of our reflection on these verses. The truth is this: the greatness of a man is not defined by the number of women he has kept in his life but the faithfulness he had shown toward the one woman whom he had covenanted to love and treasure, in sickness or in health, in good times or bad. For all married men, the key to spiritual, mental, social-emotional, and even physical stability is staying faithful to the wife you are married to.  So stay faithful!