1 Samuel 3:6-11 – Choose your ally carefully

While the war was going on between David’s and Saul’s fractions, Abner audaciously strengthened his position and power in Saul’s house. He brazenly had an open relationship with Rizpah, a concubine of Saul. What he did was reckoned as seizing the position that was once held by Saul. It was a total disregard for Ish-bosheth, who saw that as disrespect for the throne. So he confronted Abner asking him, “Why have you gone in to my father's concubine?” Those were probably not the only words he had said to Abner. He could have belittled him calling him a dog and a traitor. Calling someone a dog was to humiliate that person. Perhaps that was why Abner’s anger was triggered, So he furiously retorted saying, “Am I a dog's head of Judah?”

Abner felt that he had been faithful to the family of Saul, his brothers, and his friends. He asserted that he could have handed them over to David, but he did not. This tells us that Abner knew that the throne of Israel should rightly go to David. To him, having a relationship with Rizpah, Saul’s concubine, was a small thing and wondered why Ish-bosheth should make such a fuss of it. How Abner reacted revealed how wrong he was on at least two counts. Firstly, he should have turned the throne to David and not made Ish-bosheth the king of Israel. If he had done that, he would have done the will of God and David would be the king by now. It also would have avoided the string of needless wars between the house of Saul and David. What he did not do, perpetrated a civil war. Secondly, he had no right to sleep with Rizpah and defiled the bed of Saul. In doing that he had shown total disregard for Ish-bosheth, the puppet king, and certainly a shame to Saul. When confronted he was angry. In his anger, he swore to return the kingdom to David and transfer his allegiance to him. He vowed to help David to set up his throne over Israel and Judah, from Dan to Beersheba. For him to say what he said reveals that he knew all along that God’s will was for David to be the king over all of Israel. Verse 11 tells us that when Ish-bosheth heard what he said, he became fearful.

Meanwhile, David could have aggressively gone for the throne, but he did not do so. All that his men had done so far were more defensive. This tells us that David was a man of deep assurance. He knew that in God’s good time he would be the king. If he had acted in his own way, he could possibly complicate the plan God had for him. This gives us the first lesson. In trusting God we must operate out of rest. To trust God is to rest in Him. His ways are always higher than ours. There is no necessity to scheme and connive to try to get ahead. What God has planned for us will be delivered at the right time. It will always be on schedule and on time. Secondly, we need to know who to trust in God’s program for our lives. Like Abner to Ish-bosheth, there will also be people around us who have a personal agenda to aggrandize themselves. Learn to surround yourself with people who will speak into your life than those who will use you as a launching pad for their own ambition. Choose friends wisely. It is said that one fake friend is worse than having five enemies. But a true friend is hard to find, difficult to leave and impossible to forget. When you find one treasure him or her!